Tuesday, November 17, 2020

It's been ...

The last 'gathering' was march 13th. My grandma's funeral,  in case you wonder. I was late. Long drive,  muddied with delays.  I was already in a flare,  so the 2.5 hr drive was torturous. Arrived late, sat down, ten minutes later,  it was over. 💔 Got back in the car for the return ride home.  Threw up all the way home.  (Sorry, Sam, for that memory) Never really processed the loss.  I'm just now realizing. 😢
Since that day,  there's been nothing.  I haven't seen my dad face to face since the funeral. He's over 70. I don't know when it'll be safe to see him.  
Gatherings are no longer.  
March 13: My son closed on his first home.  I've yet to see it. 
April: 
My baby turned 18. Zero fanfare. 
My firstborn turned 30.
 We last saw one another Christmas '19. 
May:
*Mothers Day and my Birthday
*My baby graduates high school,  without ever returning from spring break in early March. Zero fanfare. 
September:
 Daughter turns 29
October: 
My son's wedding was supposed to be in October.  It's now going to be next year. 

 We're now approaching yet another 'holiday' that won't be celebrated as in the past.  
No wonder I feel this way.  


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